Hello everyone! I have a very important announcement to make, so listen carefully and get out your note tablets ok? This will be my last post on this blog. Yes, that's right. But don't go out dancing in the streets just yet. It is not the end of my posts. Actually I am moving my blog elsewhere under a new screen name and web address. There are just too many douchebags and undesirables lurking around this site, and I'd rather be rid of them for good than try to continue posting here knowing their putrid, disgusting faces are glaring molestfully at my beautiful words of truth and honor. To my fridns and allies in the war against douchebaggery and self-hate, you will know where I am when I have the new blog set up. To all the rest of you, thanks for reading, and oh yeah....
ESSE MEINE SCHEIßE!
Sunday, January 10, 2010
Monday, January 4, 2010
A Prison Story
Hello everyone, and how are you all doing? I hope you're doing super fantastic and I trust that everyone had a terrific holiday season? Good!!! Anyway, as you no doubt have noticed I have not written in quite some time and that's because I have been incarcerated in a federal prison these past several weeks. Yes, I went and assaulted some asiaphile douchebag and he decided to press charges, but I recently had my day in court and I have been found innocent of all charges and was released from custody this morning.
Well, basically what happened is I beat the ever lovin poop out of this douchebag one evening and then made his self hating bitch eat some dog feces. Later on they called the cops which I figured is what they'd do cos they're whiny self entitled little indie pussies so I made up an excuse that I did it in self defense, and right after I beat the crap out of em I went over to my friend's and had him kick me in the balls. I made a case in court that the douchebag had attacked me and I had to expose my testicals to the court as evidence, and well at that point it was their word against mine since there were no other witnesses so the court found me innocent of the charges and I was free to go.
But during the time awaiting trial I was held in a federal prison where I was repeatedly raped and made to do terrible things that I can't repeat here but they involved eating feces and that's all I'm going to say about that. I thought about counter-sueing, but I figure the 2 of them have suffered enough. Last I heard the self hating bitch is having to undergo extensive psychological therapy sessions and has been placed on suicide watch. The asiaphile douchebag has required 5 reconstructive surgical procedures to his face and gonads, and will require at least 9 follow up procedures over the next 5 years.
In the coming days and weeks I'm hoping to enter back into the normal course of life, and try to erase from memory the cruel tortures I have endured at the hands of my fellow inmates. I want to thank you all for being patient during these trying times, and thank you very much for all your prayers and support.
Yours truly,
Flapjack
Well, basically what happened is I beat the ever lovin poop out of this douchebag one evening and then made his self hating bitch eat some dog feces. Later on they called the cops which I figured is what they'd do cos they're whiny self entitled little indie pussies so I made up an excuse that I did it in self defense, and right after I beat the crap out of em I went over to my friend's and had him kick me in the balls. I made a case in court that the douchebag had attacked me and I had to expose my testicals to the court as evidence, and well at that point it was their word against mine since there were no other witnesses so the court found me innocent of the charges and I was free to go.
But during the time awaiting trial I was held in a federal prison where I was repeatedly raped and made to do terrible things that I can't repeat here but they involved eating feces and that's all I'm going to say about that. I thought about counter-sueing, but I figure the 2 of them have suffered enough. Last I heard the self hating bitch is having to undergo extensive psychological therapy sessions and has been placed on suicide watch. The asiaphile douchebag has required 5 reconstructive surgical procedures to his face and gonads, and will require at least 9 follow up procedures over the next 5 years.
In the coming days and weeks I'm hoping to enter back into the normal course of life, and try to erase from memory the cruel tortures I have endured at the hands of my fellow inmates. I want to thank you all for being patient during these trying times, and thank you very much for all your prayers and support.
Yours truly,
Flapjack
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)